Vasoconstriction and high BP

[FriendlyToker]

Hello! I have a difficult condition on the comedown - again. Ate Mitseez, three capsules, and they have just begun to get ingested. Sorry for making shitty rubbish posts asking how to cope with this and that, but I think this really needs some help. I have ingested the metoprolol today - it successfully stopped my heart beating like a beast, but right now it's beating slowly - about 80-90 bpm, sometimes even coming down to 60-50-40! - but with very weird pressure (136/55 @ 60 bpm or ~160/120 @ 80-90bpm). I feel like my neck is stiff and I feel lightheaded. I'm trying to lay down to keep the blood flowing, and put my legs high so more oxygenated blood enters the brain. I hear a humming sound in my ears from time to time and that neck stiffness... and my hands are pale and knees are getting purple. I have visual distortions sometimes too. Seems like 50mg of the metoprolol was too much, and the substances I ate today make a way for a bad comedown this substance is trying to stop. But it can't, and my heart is right now feeling weird, like tingly. I am scared. I really am. Never gonna do that again in that dosage, NEVAR!

First things first, I have to wait till the comedown goes away and leaves my strained heart alone - as it's changing BP and bpm the way it wants, whenever it wants, and however it wants, with my head feeling tingly, legs heavy and neck stiff. I hope I will be alright, although only thinking of calling an ambulance makes my adrenal glands surge of all the rest of adrenaline it has. Including the fact that I didn't eat for a long time and won't do so in a while for sure.
If I live, I'll write a good trip report just like the one I did with Jax. Just wait, and you'll see. But first, I have to stay alive. Ain't that simple, when everything feels so light-headed. Maybe these are just the pills that haven't yet been ingested into the bloodstream are coming on just now? If so, then I'm screwed - as I took three over a course of four hours. One, after another hour another one, and after another hour. Well, you'll see my point when I write up the report...
IF I KEEP ON LIVIN!


EDIT:
And, I don't believe these are just Butylone. If so, then why did LU put Butylone AND MCPP in the Doves? MCPP is a shitty shit, and if this is pure Butylone then it works pretty fair on it's own, so why would I even bother poisoning myself with a piperazine, thanks to which i wasn't able to sleep for a few nights of my life...
And, if this is the effect of the drug and not the heart problem, then you oughta know, that more pills = visuals. Letters are shifting and there are dark fogs that cloud my view sometimes. Or, rather, a glow - I'm writing that edit and looking at the cursor, if I stop focusing my signature gets very glowy, every colour gets bleached and intensed at the same time... very smooth, but very "there". Just can't enjoy it while I'm scared shitless, can I?


I have some beer and zolpidem, and MJ, to keep me distracted from the comedown. But taking my NEXT heart paranoia into account I don't know whether I should use these at all. If I can, which one of these substances I could use to help myself to sleep or just to enjoy the dying (literally - if I'm really dying, and metaphorically - because the comedown is going to be strong when pills are digested in the middle of the night after a long, tiring day).

What should I do?

Tl;Dr - my palms are sweaty, legs feel numb and very heavy, my knees are purple, I'm getting fog in my view and weird blood pressure and pulse, climbing up and down and up and down the way it wants and when it wants.

Tell me how often should I check the pulse and pressure and what should i do with the substances I have listed: Zolpidem, Marijuana and alcohol.

[enduin]

First, you are not gonna die, trust me. Your BP and heart rate are not that strange, I have those values many times when I'm normal.
Second, don't take more drugs, don't mess yourself up more than you already are! Just lay down, try to relax. It will end eventually. If things really get nasty you should call for help, but I'm sure it won't be needed. You just messed yourself up, and you'll feel like shit for a while. That's it, accept it and relax.

[enduin]

Oh and don't check your heart rate every 30 seconds, it will just make you more anxious, and hence more stressed and heart would rise. Check it every 10-15min if you want, just to see if it's all right.
And really, don't use the other drugs, that could be dangerous. If at some point you really feel like things are bad, call for ambulance instead. But you'll see you won't need it.

[FriendlyToker]

I went to the bathroom and back, my BP spiked through the roof, the humming sound and arrythmia is present. I presume there are some shitty Piperazines in this Ministry - which are the cause of the high bp every time i take them. The problem now is, that I have blocked the pulse from climbing up by the metoprolol - and thus the BP is even higher to give the oxygenated blood to the organs. Normally if I take Ministry I just lay in bed, and listen to my heart going 140-150-160 all night, but with a stable and secure blood pressure - around 140/100. Right now my BP is: 133/61, pulse 80 - but I wouldn't say these are accurate results, as the meter takes about half a minute with the pressure pumped in to slowly put it out and measure the BP. And the problem is - my BP and pulse changes quicker than this device can measure the current BP, so I presume I will just have to measure it every minute or two, just to be sure. I'm sitting, although I should lay down. I will - in a second, right after I get your answers. I hope I'll get them sooner than when I die. But let me measure my BP again: 137/80. Seems fine on the meter, but as I said - I don't trust it, because I think it's broken - my heart was once going 160 bpm on that shitty Ivory, I think, considering the amount of words I am writing and the need to communicate, that these pills really have begun to get ingested only a little time ago. I feel warm, I'm starting to sweat - should I get myself some cooled down water to cool myself down? Should I stay in clothes or should I take them off? Should I put my legs into a warm water?'





EDIT:
The problem with the view is that it doesn't change colours, it's like the perception is focused on a point in the screen - like the cursor, for example - and the rest of the screen is like shadowed, moving and morphing a little. I have seen a white thing, like a coat, over my monitor in the dark. This is getting weird, I think zolpidem would potentiate these effects That could do well. But I'm afraid of mixing Zolpidem with another vasoconstrictor - snuff tobacco, that is sniffed with Zolpi to make it come up faster (somehow).

But I will not at this moment - the heart is in too bad condition, I'm feeling a cramp-like tightness in it. I have just felt a movement in my stomach - means that the content in it had moved. I just hope, so much hope there're no more undigested capsules.
I hope.

It just beaten weirdly and ringing in my ears appeared for a second, and now it's just going very slow, with a feeling of being weak/faint. I'm going to lay down and oxygenate the brain by lifting the legs up.

Would it be a good idea to sleep?

[FriendlyToker]

I had another bowel movement (just a feeling of the guts moving the matter in the stomach), and another wave had hitten me. They must me digested now - I had the same thing with one and a half a Doves, but it was one and a half, not three or four even stronger pills!
I can hear ringing in my ears and feeling weak sometimes in my heart and feel like I'm going through a really big stress and like my body can't handle it anymore and it's close to fainting. I have just felt a funny twitch in my heart, like a needle being stuck in it. I'm gonna measure the BP: 140/80, pulse: 86. Seems to be fine, right? Except for the pulse. It's way too slow, but I can't speed it up. So why is there a ringing in my ear that comes in waves and scares the hell out of me? I'm breathing slowly, deeply, laying down, chilling as much as I possibly can.
Right now, just at this very moment, I can feel another wave coming up. It is truly COMING UP. And ringing in my ear is getting louder. Not stable at all... Another sound, a beep-like, like being stunned by a grenade in Half Life 2 or any other game.
I'm laying, listening to my heartbeat, and another sound comes on and doesn't want to go away. It sounds pretty much just like a bunch of randomly played tones, but the main problem of them is the fact, that they are scary and they always happen when the heart slows down. And when it does, I scare the hell out of myself, because it goes so slow I can't even imagine how does the blood circulate with that. And these humming, beeping and ringing always keep coming.


I don't know, I have a herbal remedy for high blood pressure, but it's herbal and it's made of, I don't know the plant's name in English, so I'll give you everything I found in the dictionary:
1 English hawthorn
2 may
3 May-tree
4 maytree
5 whitethorn
6 Crataegus oxycantha

I think these are the ways this plant is called. It's used as a high pressure remedy, although I'm not sure whether this will be any useful at the moment. The pulse is slowing down, I need to check the BP (oh crap, I just had to lean down to get the pressure checker and I have almost fainted, the heart bp went through the roof, and now it's stuck on it's beepy-ringy state) - it has got a tendention to rise first, and then fall along with the heart rate to extremely low rates. Let me see... Why does this have to take so long? It says: 122/85, with bp of 95, but it doesn't feel like it at all. I'll check the pulse myself, as I prefer to do it this way - it's more accurate. In the middle of playing with the phone looking for the stopwatch to count time of, I have just experienced a truly bad feeling in my heart. I'm afraid that when I go to sleep I'll die. The worst things that happen are the sudden surges of adrenaline that occurs when I get a panic attack (when I feel a twitch in my heart or something). I haven't eaten anything yet, and I don't think I could eat anything right now. I am pumping the oxygenated blood into the brain by lifting legs, seems to be working... for a short period of time, after which the humming starts again. Here's another thing - everytime I move myself, my bp rises very much and the pulse drops hard, to less than 1 beat per 2 seconds sometimes, and I am just worried that once it will happen and the heart won't speed up again as it's supposed to when the bp's stabilised. But it's not, and it's going crazy if it comes to regulation of the pressure and the pulse. It goes crazy, and by crazy, I really mean CRAZY - moving my hand is enough to produce that buzzy sound again and make my heart almost stop. Metoclopramide had done it's job WELL! God damn it, why did I take 50mg's. Wasn't it the long-release tablet that I broke up into a powder and then swallowed? No way! can't be! Toker is getting dumber day by day, forgetting that this is the dose enough for the whole day and it's slowly released if swallowed normally. Normal dose for my problem would have probably be half a pill - 25mg's.

Oh, and... did I mention that I'm still stimulated and feel no sleepiness at all? And those jellyfishes, random fishes, even a head of a horse in the darkness? White, light hallucinations that appear on like a black fog in front of my eyes. I really am laying down right now and I can't move, because it would shoot me into a blackout probably.



How will I know that I'm going to black out for sure?


OHSHIT! I can't measure the blood pressure, because when that baggie fills with air it almost instantly makes it harder for the heart to pump up and I get fainty. I'll have to put it out.


I feel warm and I'm sweating, should I cool mybody down?


And I still haven't eaten anything yet. What do you think aboutdrinking a glass of water with six teaspoons of sugar?


My mouth is getting numb. It doesn't go away like few minutes ago. I'll probably faint.

I have no other idea - my fingers are getting numb, the vision is getting blurry and that ringing in the ears is more and more often felt. WHAT SHOULD I DO?! THIS IS THE LAST MINUTE I CAN DO ANYTHING!
I am trying to move a little, it seems to make the heart go crazy all over the place, but at least working and speeding it up and keeping the pressure, because it's going really slow - about 60-70 bpm. Might try checking the blood pressure, but you have to tell me if it would be any helpful. If yes, I'll do, if no - I won't.

It has gotten worse, I will probably faint. This is so weird,I'mma die in my own bed without anybody here and with the whole family sleeping. Sad,but...well. The mouth is numb, the beeping is back. My fingers aren't getting enough blood either... Getting number and number. The numbness is ascending, the heartbeat is around 50bpm. Every time I lean to the laptop to write something, I can feel the bp rising, and pulse dropping extremely. I'm going to lay down right now and wish for the best. And I will somehow crawl my way to the sugar, glass and water - as I really haven't eaten anything for over 12 hours.
My age? Over 9000. It's irrelevant. Ahh, the ringing in the eyes is getting worse. Wayyy worse and louder. I would just LOVE to have ANY control over that goddamn muscle, but why does it have to be some neurons and chemicals changing their routes that do it?

If this was any other comedown, I wouldn't blab so much - because, well, I'd then have a high pressure and a need to make it little. That wouldn't be a problem then - some alcohol or zolpidem would do well enough to put me to sleep. But the problem is with the betablocker - that I have ingested to stop the pressure from rising while high on pills, but it didn't work that good - why? Because of a blockage I have in my guts! It stops everything from being digested normally. Two months of an often codeine use and laremide (both are opioids, both just, to be precise, slow down the peristalsis, and I took enough codeine every time I had three days of my ass stopped. Then some diarrhoea, but when it started I had either loperamide or another glass of codeine nearby. I had surely made my crap become a solid metal. Taking the stuff I ate, the lots of it, and the frequency of taking the dump surely points out to me screwing up really hard. If I stay alive, I will eat the whole pack of a diarrhoea agent and shit the crap out of my guts. But I don't feel like I'm going to keep on living - this creepy ringing in ears in every possible tone is creeping me out and it surely indicates something like "you're gonna die soon, your heart is almost giving up" - and the fact that this sound always appears when the heart has no power to pump the blood. I really need sugar, but I'm too terrified to go there and take it, because I will have to make so many moves - and, of course, stand up, unless I crawl - to get these. And this is something a bit too much for this almost-arrested heart.
And I grinded my tooth to the blood. Literally, the tooth root is out and every time I chew on it now I can feel pain. Not much of it, but well enough to consider it damaged.

This is fucked up. I'll never, ever mix The Ministry with Mitseez's (especially two of the first and four of the second), and NO MORE OPIATES FOR ME! NO MORE! I NEED MY GASTROINTESTINAL UNIT WORKING PROPERLY! YES, TO POP PILLS!
I can see shades on my vision. I need to reoxygenate the brain as best as I can, and then... well, lay down and try to keep the blood flow anyhow. Anything that could speed up my heart rate without killing me?

The scariest thing is... I have been playing with codeine on Monday. Next day, with a full GI tract stoppage, I have eaten 50mg's of crushed 50mg metoprolol tablet. I think it had been digested this night as well. I had such cases, it did happen to me, that a pill didn't work for a long, long time, a week even, if I managed to cover it inbetween some french fries and meat. Or between two bananas. It takes 3-4-5 days for the GI tract to start after a good dose of Codeine for me, and about 12-24 hours for laremide.

Do the math.
I did.
I have enough, really. My head is running, but the heart is almost dead. I write long posts leaning in an uncomfortable position, explaining my medical condition to strangers,, for what I feel stupid about. It's not the comedown yet, hell - as I said, my head is runnung, but my heart is just struggling.


EDIT:
God. Another bowel movement, signalizing another pill digested. I hope that these were digested at night, please, not now, not now... Because if it was digested right now, it means I should await a bp rise in a moment. Which will put my heart to sleep.

EDIT2: As I have expected. A bp rise, to which my heart shook vigorously. It's beating so slow and weak now that I can barely feel the pulse. Whatever, I'mma check my bp: 127/60, pulse around 50, sometimes rises to 70-80, sometimes falls down to 20bpm, or what I call "a warning sign", the fact that the heart stopped beating is not really nice, thus I try to move before it slows down to such extremely low rate. This way I can keep ~constant blood pressure. One thing I know - It's not that constant, it's rather a sinusoidal wave of ups and downs, both scary as hell, every sound makes me wonder if I die, and when the heart wil stop?
I hope that it'll never stop. Unless that 50mg's of Metoprolol is 100mg's. Any particle of that substance left in my GI tract - I'm dead. Literally.
Oh, I felt another movement. And the heartbeat's rising! And the blood pressure is doing so too. The problem is - when bp rises, the heart rate falls down. When does the bp rise? Every time I move my body it skyrockets, and makes the pulse slow down so bad...
Well, another bowel movement. I just have noidea what else is still to digest and absorb into the brain that is going hard but the heart... Shit. it was not one little movement, these were simultaneous! I can only pray it didn't absorb any more of these pills. How much was digested, anyway? How much is left?
I'm sweating and the heart somehow stings me.


EDIT3 And the guts are really moving now - if they absorb all of the rest of the pills at once, it might not really end up funny!!

[Pandy]

I don't want to sound unsympathetic but it does sound a lot like you are talking yourself into it.

BP and HR change up and downnormally when you move about anyways. Stop checking yours so often because to me it sounds like you are focusing on it way too much.

I don't think that drinking 6 teaspoons of sugar will do any good... it's just another drug that your body will fight with... sugar high, sugar low and all that insulin inbetween. do you have any liquid meal shakes? your body is craving more than just simple sugars...

I have to ask why you haven't pumped your stomach? even just to empty it and flush out whatever might still be there with water.

I've only found myself in that near-death situation a couple of times in my life and when I look back now I remember what a difference having someone come round and babysit me thru the worst of it. there is some peace of mind that comes from having someone to talk it thru with and who can if needed call the ambulance and to make some lame arse jokes about what they're gonna do with your stuff when you die. having someone around can provide distraction from counting heartbeats, measuring BP and getting caught up in the mind fuck.

I do hope that you are OK FriendlyToker

[FriendlyToker]

I'm sure it's not in the stomach -it has already been put into the GI upper tract. I can feel it, because every movement moves it down - to the lower GI tract. I am not talking myself into it - I know exactly what is going on with my body, because I've had it since... well, forever. I have understood how to cope with fake signals. But fake signals don't make your fingers go numb or your mouth. And it surely doesnt cause such feelings in the chest.
My heart had just ached a bit more than usual. What do you think willhappen/? Will it bloww up? If so, I prefer to get myself into a benzodiazepine coma, just so I won't know when I'll be dead.

And, uh... sorry, if that sounded rude. I didn't mean to be like that, I just want to clarify my knowledge about my body and it's needs. ;)

[FriendlyToker]

# Tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) - the major active chemical in marijuana. Its mild vasodilating effects redden the eyes of cannabis users.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasodilation

What do you think? There is still alot of the substance in thupper GI tract, it's still being absorbed and stresses the heart. When I hear that sound from the guts after a second or two I feel the heart getting stressed, and every dose makes it more difficult for the heart to pump blood. I don't know what sgould I do. I gonna just lay down, make sure the blood is oxidated and flowing and that's all. ;)

[Pandy]

no probs. you weren't rude. you appropriately put me in my place :o and I had been making some poor assumptions.

[FriendlyToker]

The blood pressure is way too low. I'mma try one beer to keep it higher -I've read that alcohol increases blood pressure. I am right now experiencing rather powerful surges of these pills that got stuck in the guts. They seem to powerfully stress the heart, to the point of it shaking in the chest. I'd really use atropine iv.

[enduin]

Alcohol decrease blood pressure and is a SNC depressant. Really don't take anything, some water or OJ to keep hydrated and that's all. Right now it's 11am in your country too right? IF you are still in this bad spot I'd strongly suggest you to call some friends; as Pandy said having someone close when you feel like this means everything!

[FriendlyToker]

My blood pressure dropped to extremely low value, it's almost not beating at all. I feel numbness in my fingers, mouth, legs... I think I failed at keeping myself alive. There is no other way of making the blood pressure go up. I feel numbness descending on my chest, although I still do my best to keep the blood flowing. Any suggestions on what should I do?
How will I know that I'll black out for sure?

[enduin]

Man I think your mind is playing tricks to you. you surely feel like shit, but please follow this simple reasoning: you started posting about this when it was 2am, and you were already saying you had numb hands, you were about to faint, etc. Now more than 10 hours have passed and you still haven't blacked out right? So this means that you probably won't black out at all, you just feel like you are about to die every minute, but it's not really going to happen! You just need to relax and have someone, everyone close, that's it.

[FriendlyToker]

Yes, I understand - create more positive attitude towards the state. If I'm in it, I might as well enjoy. But it wasn't. In any way. I don't enjoy having to check my pulse every minute, feeling faint every time I move my arm. It is a really hardcore situation, where I can't even move my arm because of this vasoconstriction and low blood pressure. Getting to sit up stops the heart for two seconds, after which it starts to lightly pump any blood up. So I'm laying flat and letting the weak heart do at least this ;) Standing up doesn't work for more than few seconds, same about sitting down, so I'd probably rather not do these again, because it just... damages the already highly suppressed system. Even putting the face up just to see the laptop screen for a few seconds makes me powerless, and my heart really does feel terrifyingly weak. Can't even go take a leak. And red smudges, like a fog, is forming in front of my view, making me rest very often - every few seconds, I presume. It seems like the heart can't pump blood with enough pressure and I get very lightheaded.

[enduin]

It surely is an hardcore situation, just lay down and try to relax. Try to take your mind away from this, think about something, say prayers if you are a believer, whatever can work for you. It will end eventually, the shit you took won't last forever! Still it would be much better if you weren't alone.

[FriendlyToker]

I had another bowel movement (just a feeling of the guts moving the matter in the stomach), and another wave had hitten me. They must me digested now - I had the same thing with one and a half a Doves, but it was one and a half, not three or four even stronger pills!
I can hear ringing in my ears and feeling weak sometimes in my heart and feel like I'm going through a really big stress and like my body can't handle it anymore and it's close to fainting. I have just felt a funny twitch in my heart, like a needle being stuck in it. I'm gonna measure the BP: 140/80, pulse: 86. Seems to be fine, right? Except for the pulse. It's way too slow, but I can't speed it up. So why is there a ringing in my ear that comes in waves and scares the hell out of me? I'm breathing slowly, deeply, laying down, chilling as much as I possibly can.
Right now, just at this very moment, I can feel another wave coming up. It is truly COMING UP. And ringing in my ear is getting louder. Not stable at all... Another sound, a beep-like, like being stunned by a grenade in Half Life 2 or any other game.
I'm laying, listening to my heartbeat, and another sound comes on and doesn't want to go away. It sounds pretty much just like a bunch of randomly played tones, but the main problem of them is the fact, that they are scary and they always happen when the heart slows down. And when it does, I scare the hell out of myself, because it goes so slow I can't even imagine how does the blood circulate with that. And these humming, beeping and ringing always keep coming.


I don't know, I have a herbal remedy for high blood pressure, but it's herbal and it's made of, I don't know the plant's name in English, so I'll give you everything I found in the dictionary:
1 English hawthorn
2 may
3 May-tree
4 maytree
5 whitethorn
6 Crataegus oxycantha

I think these are the ways this plant is called. It's used as a high pressure remedy, although I'm not sure whether this will be any useful at the moment. The pulse is slowing down, I need to check the BP (oh crap, I just had to lean down to get the pressure checker and I have almost fainted, the heart bp went through the roof, and now it's stuck on it's beepy-ringy state) - it has got a tendention to rise first, and then fall along with the heart rate to extremely low rates. Let me see... Why does this have to take so long? It says: 122/85, with bp of 95, but it doesn't feel like it at all. I'll check the pulse myself, as I prefer to do it this way - it's more accurate. In the middle of playing with the phone looking for the stopwatch to count time of, I have just experienced a truly bad feeling in my heart. I'm afraid that when I go to sleep I'll die. The worst things that happen are the sudden surges of adrenaline that occurs when I get a panic attack (when I feel a twitch in my heart or something). I haven't eaten anything yet, and I don't think I could eat anything right now. I am pumping the oxygenated blood into the brain by lifting legs, seems to be working... for a short period of time, after which the humming starts again. Here's another thing - everytime I move myself, my bp rises very much and the pulse drops hard, to less than 1 beat per 2 seconds sometimes, and I am just worried that once it will happen and the heart won't speed up again as it's supposed to when the bp's stabilised. But it's not, and it's going crazy if it comes to regulation of the pressure and the pulse. It goes crazy, and by crazy, I really mean CRAZY - moving my hand is enough to produce that buzzy sound again and make my heart almost stop. Metoclopramide had done it's job WELL! God damn it, why did I take 50mg's. Wasn't it the long-release tablet that I broke up into a powder and then swallowed? No way! can't be! Toker is getting dumber day by day, forgetting that this is the dose enough for the whole day and it's slowly released if swallowed normally. Normal dose for my problem would have probably be half a pill - 25mg's.

Oh, and... did I mention that I'm still stimulated and feel no sleepiness at all? And those jellyfishes, random fishes, even a head of a horse in the darkness? White, light hallucinations that appear on like a black fog in front of my eyes. I really am laying down right now and I can't move, because it would shoot me into a blackout probably.



How will I know that I'm going to black out for sure?


OHSHIT! I can't measure the blood pressure, because when that baggie fills with air it almost instantly makes it harder for the heart to pump up and I get fainty. I'll have to put it out.


I feel warm and I'm sweating, should I cool mybody down?


And I still haven't eaten anything yet. What do you think aboutdrinking a glass of water with six teaspoons of sugar?


My mouth is getting numb. It doesn't go away like few minutes ago. I'll probably faint.

I have no other idea - my fingers are getting numb, the vision is getting blurry and that ringing in the ears is more and more often felt. WHAT SHOULD I DO?! THIS IS THE LAST MINUTE I CAN DO ANYTHING!
I am trying to move a little, it seems to make the heart go crazy all over the place, but at least working and speeding it up and keeping the pressure, because it's going really slow - about 60-70 bpm. Might try checking the blood pressure, but you have to tell me if it would be any helpful. If yes, I'll do, if no - I won't.

It has gotten worse, I will probably faint. This is so weird,I'mma die in my own bed without anybody here and with the whole family sleeping. Sad,but...well. The mouth is numb, the beeping is back. My fingers aren't getting enough blood either... Getting number and number. The numbness is ascending, the heartbeat is around 50bpm. Every time I lean to the laptop to write something, I can feel the bp rising, and pulse dropping extremely. I'm going to lay down right now and wish for the best. And I will somehow crawl my way to the sugar, glass and water - as I really haven't eaten anything for over 12 hours.
My age? Over 9000. It's irrelevant. Ahh, the ringing in the eyes is getting worse. Wayyy worse and louder. I would just LOVE to have ANY control over that goddamn muscle, but why does it have to be some neurons and chemicals changing their routes that do it?

If this was any other comedown, I wouldn't blab so much - because, well, I'd then have a high pressure and a need to make it little. That wouldn't be a problem then - some alcohol or zolpidem would do well enough to put me to sleep. But the problem is with the betablocker - that I have ingested to stop the pressure from rising while high on pills, but it didn't work that good - why? Because of a blockage I have in my guts! It stops everything from being digested normally. Two months of an often codeine use and laremide (both are opioids, both just, to be precise, slow down the peristalsis, and I took enough codeine every time I had three days of my ass stopped. Then some diarrhoea, but when it started I had either loperamide or another glass of codeine nearby. I had surely made my crap become a solid metal. Taking the stuff I ate, the lots of it, and the frequency of taking the dump surely points out to me screwing up really hard. If I stay alive, I will eat the whole pack of a diarrhoea agent and shit the crap out of my guts. But I don't feel like I'm going to keep on living - this creepy ringing in ears in every possible tone is creeping me out and it surely indicates something like "you're gonna die soon, your heart is almost giving up" - and the fact that this sound always appears when the heart has no power to pump the blood. I really need sugar, but I'm too terrified to go there and take it, because I will have to make so many moves - and, of course, stand up, unless I crawl - to get these. And this is something a bit too much for this almost-arrested heart.
And I grinded my tooth to the blood. Literally, the tooth root is out and every time I chew on it now I can feel pain. Not much of it, but well enough to consider it damaged.

This is fucked up. I'll never, ever mix The Ministry with Mitseez's (especially two of the first and four of the second), and NO MORE OPIATES FOR ME! NO MORE! I NEED MY GASTROINTESTINAL UNIT WORKING PROPERLY! YES, TO POP PILLS!
I can see shades on my vision. I need to reoxygenate the brain as best as I can, and then... well, lay down and try to keep the blood flow anyhow. Anything that could speed up my heart rate without killing me?

The scariest thing is... I have been playing with codeine on Monday. Next day, with a full GI tract stoppage, I have eaten 50mg's of crushed 50mg metoprolol tablet. I think it had been digested this night as well. I had such cases, it did happen to me, that a pill didn't work for a long, long time, a week even, if I managed to cover it inbetween some french fries and meat. Or between two bananas. It takes 3-4-5 days for the GI tract to start after a good dose of Codeine for me, and about 12-24 hours for laremide.

Do the math.
I did.
I have enough, really. My head is running, but the heart is almost dead. I write long posts leaning in an uncomfortable position, explaining my medical condition to strangers,, for what I feel stupid about. It's not the comedown yet, hell - as I said, my head is runnung, but my heart is just struggling.


EDIT:
God. Another bowel movement, signalizing another pill digested. I hope that these were digested at night, please, not now, not now... Because if it was digested right now, it means I should await a bp rise in a moment. Which will put my heart to sleep.

EDIT2: As I have expected. A bp rise, to which my heart shook vigorously. It's beating so slow and weak now that I can barely feel the pulse. Whatever, I'mma check my bp: 127/60, pulse around 50, sometimes rises to 70-80, sometimes falls down to 20bpm, or what I call "a warning sign", the fact that the heart stopped beating is not really nice, thus I try to move before it slows down to such extremely low rate. This way I can keep ~constant blood pressure. One thing I know - It's not that constant, it's rather a sinusoidal wave of ups and downs, both scary as hell, every sound makes me wonder if I die, and when the heart wil stop?
I hope that it'll never stop. Unless that 50mg's of Metoprolol is 100mg's. Any particle of that substance left in my GI tract - I'm dead. Literally.
Oh, I felt another movement. And the heartbeat's rising! And the blood pressure is doing so too. The problem is - when bp rises, the heart rate falls down. When does the bp rise? Every time I move my body it skyrockets, and makes the pulse slow down so bad...
Well, another bowel movement. I just have noidea what else is still to digest and absorb into the brain that is going hard but the heart... Shit. it was not one little movement, these were simultaneous! I can only pray it didn't absorb any more of these pills. How much was digested, anyway? How much is left?
I'm sweating and the heart somehow stings me.


EDIT3 And the guts are really moving now - if they absorb all of the rest of the pills at once, it might not really end up funny!!


Man I think your mind is playing tricks to you. you surely feel like shit, but please follow this simple reasoning: you started posting about this when it was 2am, and you were already saying you had numb hands, you were about to faint, etc. Now more than 10 hours have passed and you still haven't blacked out right? So this means that you probably won't black out at all, you just feel like you are about to die every minute, but it's not really going to happen! You just need to relax and have someone, everyone close, that's it.




I would love if it was that easy - there are these pills that are getting absorbed right now, increasing the dose from time to time, with still every dose - followed by very short, little movement in the guts. It happens every, I don't know... minute-two, sometimes more. It stresses the heart after few seconds, makes it go faster, and making a problem with the pressure and pulse. And stresses the heart that has a problem with pumping at all. So that's why I'm nervous about it. I wouldn't like my heart to fail.

[Mona Lisa]

Sorry to sound harsh but you need to pull yourself together and stop being so foolish with yourself! You're only going to end up dead if you carry on like this!! At the very least, you will end up damaging your health. It sounds to me like you have addictive tendencies so should probably give up drugs, and certainly gives stims a wide berth. As I was saying on the CHilled place, it gives legals a bad name when people can't take them sensibly and ends up ruining it for others. Sorry if I sound angry but maybe i am a little bit. I'm only human, after all.

I also think you need to see a doctor about your blood pressure because it shouldn't be so high at your age. I seem to think you're still only about 18 or 19. If nothing else, they could recommend an appropriate regime for you regarding medication because self-medicating for stims can be very dangerous, especially with beta-blockers. If you have to take anything to lower it down, you'd be better off with the herbal one you were mentioning and perhaps an ACE inhibitor or calcium channel blocker because those types of blood pressure pills are not so drastic on the heart rate, plus can be stopped more easily. Beta Blockers can be very dangerous to come off of, so you really need to see the doctor soon about all this. Good luck!

[enduin]

I was keeping the berating for when he's out of this... but I wholeheartedly agree, this behaviour is just suicidal, having had one (or two) serious heart issues just two days ago with other stims and went out with beta-blockers (that are not stuff to fuck with as you said), how can someone seriously think to eat a new bunch of stim drugs (and not even knowing what the fuck is in them!) and not having problems???

[Pandy]

just some food for thought here and I'm not diminishing your experience FT...

I am reminded very strongly of one of my worst and most terrifying experience with a LSA extraction. Within 40minutes of ingesting a horrible liquid my legs were in agony, I was nauseous, my head pulsing - my temples ached. I thought and assured myself 'ok this is just the come-up, it'll pass, been here before with other stuff'

I can tell you that the bodily experience worsened and didn't let up for some 8+hrs. my extremities were white, the vasoconstriction was a killer, I could feel the arteries in my thighs wanting to explode, worst of all panic was holding me ransom. every little thing became the focus for the next 5secs. hypervigilant to every odd feeling then to the next thing and the next. I have a electronic BP/HR monitor which I wrestled onto my arm after I stopped feeling my Heartbeat, at one point it told me that my HR was over 300bpm. that caused me to panic even more, I felt like crying because I didn't want to die, I couldn't cry because I was still hanging on every other little thing. I was an emotion flip-flop and couldn't calm myself at all. By this point about 3hrs into the ordeal I began hallucinating vivid CEVs no OEVs but I can tell you - panic and trippin' is not a fun place at all. I thought I was going to die. my HR/BP monitor was telling me nonsense mostly because i was in no state to operate it correctly. which only added to my panic. negative thoughts started to fill me and swirl around like crows. at one point i tried to clear my stomach which had been in a constant cramp since that 40min mark pasted. I couldn't, the wrechin' made my head pound and closing my eyes - well that was frekin terrifying.

finally my g/f came home and saw me, she got me a glass of water and told me to drink this slowly this will calm you down as I rub your back, as you are drinkin it - narrate out loud to me what you are doing. sounds weird but it worked. "raising glass to lips, taking a small sip...etc" this simple thing slowed everything right down and made me focus on something outside of me.

[FriendlyToker]

I am alive. And it's not only right, it's sure I am laying off for a longer time. Thank you for your support and sorry for thrashing the forum.

[Mona Lisa]

Thank God you're OK. But I really think that you should see a doctor about your blood pressure and that you would probably better to call it a day with drugs altogether.